I have a question for you. Do you like to feel special or generic? When circumstances are favorable, most people will say ‘special.’ Then why do so many people insist on calling me ma’am when they full well know my name? Why?

Real World Story: Can you relate to any of the following real world situations?

  1. My name is Barbara. I introduce myself as Barbara. Yet people insist on immediately calling me Barb. In emails, I sign my name as Barbara—but people reply to Barb.47576345 - businessman spotlight human resource recruitment candidate, business people hire concept flat vector illustration
  2. My ex-husband’s name is Michel (pronounced “Michael” but spelled without the “a”). I can’t tell you how many people, including very close friends, consistently spell his name with the “a.”
  3. A friend of mine signs her name “Andi.” However, many people who address or reply to her do so to “Andie,”  “Andy, ” “Andrea,” and even “Andrew.” In her words, “When people don’t care enough to pay attention to the detail of how I spell my name, I am always left wondering what other details they will miss. In general, I have a choice of where I spend my money. Not spelling my name correctly is enough cause for me to take my business elsewhere.” Nicely said, don’t you think?

Strategies that Turn it Around:

  1. People love to hear the sound of their name. And they love to see it in big lights! Well, maybe not all of us. If you don’t know how to pronounce someone’s name, simply ask to correctly pronounce it. People with complex names are accustomed to answering this question and usually have an easy answer for you. After you show this courtesy, many will even say, “Don’t worry about it; just call me B!”
  2. When writing emails, pay attention to the correct spelling of people’s names—especially if writing to one person only! Misspelling names of clients, customers, and even would-be friends, suggests a lack of attention to detail, which can result in lost customers. The few seconds it takes to double-check name spellings can save you thousands of dollars in the short and long run.
  3. Wondering how to get a name correctly? Try this approach: “Hi my name is Barbara. May I have your name, please?” Most people willing give up their name when asked politely. This is especially useful if you see a spelling you can’t pronounce.  If possible, write down the name phonetically (bar-bra) so you can remember it!

Remember: We ALL have an innate need to feel special and important. Thus our names are sacred to each and every one of us. What better way to make people feel important than using their name correctly—in person, on the phone, and especially in writing.

What do YOU do to correctly remember people’s names? Feel free to send me an email and let me know your ideas.

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